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A Family Woman
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A FAMILY WOMAN
A novel by
T. B. MARKINSON
Published by T. B. Markinson
Visit T. B. Markinson’s official website at www.lesbianromancesbytbm.com/ for the latest news, book details, and other information.
Copyright © T. B. Markinson, 2016
Cover Design by Erin Dameron-Hill / EDHGraphics
Edited by Karin Cox
Proofread by Kelly Hashway
e-book formatting by Guido Henkel
This e-book is copyrighted and licensed for your personal enjoyment only. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any forms or by any means without the prior permission of the copyright owner. The moral rights of the author have been asserted.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
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A Woman Lost Series
A Clueless Woman (Prequel to A Woman Lost)
A Woman Lost
A Woman Ignored
A Family Woman
Chapter One
I released an audible sigh and rubbed my sweaty palms on my jeans. The news we’d just received from the OB-GYN continued to churn through my mind.
“You okay, Lizzie?” Sarah flicked on the windshield wipers to clear away the beginning flakes of a snowstorm. She peeked out of the corner of her eye, not wanting to take all her attention off the road as we approached a red light on the corner of College Avenue and Drake.
The clock on the SUV’s dash ticked one minute past noon.
I nodded, my tongue and vocal cords unable to function.
The light turned green, and we continued along Drake.
“I know it was a shock,” she said, placing a hand on my thigh. “Talk to me.”
How could I express my thoughts after hearing that news?
“Hey, you aren’t the only one who’s living through this. Stop being this way.” Her voice hardened, but her squeeze of my thigh let me know she wasn’t completely annoyed; she understood the enormity of the situation.
She was right, per usual. I had a habit of clamming up when my world was rocked to the core, as it had been earlier today. More often than not, it was the worst choice to make when it came to discussing “things” with Sarah, who was an open book.
“I’m fine. I promise.” Try as I might, I couldn’t banish the quiver from my voice.
Sarah exhaled and drummed her fingers on the steering wheel. “You hungry?” Without waiting for an answer, she added, “I’m famished.”
It was then that it dawned on me: she was driving toward her favorite Vietnamese place, not toward our home, which was in the opposite direction. At the moment, I thought the mere whiff of food would send me running for a toilet.
My nerves weren’t just jangled. Rattled wasn’t the right word, either. It was worse than that. Much worse. Whenever this level of fear and shock roiled through my system, it didn’t take much for the idiot in me to say the wrong thing, hence why I typically shut my trap. If there was a manual for idiots who struggled with social situations, the first rule would be: when in doubt don’t say a word. Maybe I should write the manual, since everyone close to me was constantly pointing out areas where I needed work so I could interact better with human beings.
My mind backtracked to the matter at hand. Sarah wanted lunch. I think that was what she’d said. “Uh, sure.”
Sarah parked close to the entrance. Inside, the joint was deserted. A woman behind the hostess podium smiled warmly and waved for us to follow her past the empty tables and booths to the far end of the restaurant, as if there was only one table left. Maybe she expected a large lunch rush at any moment.
Sarah ordered for both of us: noodles with stir-fried lemongrass chicken for her and a simple beef and rice bowl for me. After the woman left, Sarah stroked my hand. “It’s going to be okay. You and I are going to be okay.” She lowered her head to meet my gaze.
Even her gorgeous chocolate-brown eyes couldn’t comfort me. I forced a smile. Okay? How was everything going to be okay? I wasn’t equipped to handle the situation—from birth, my family had handicapped my ability to deal with…
Sarah interrupted my train of thought. “You know, when I was in college, my favorite meal was the two cheeseburger meal at McDonald’s.” She cocked her head as if the memory fixed everything. “Know why?”
Puzzled, I cupped my chin with my hand to support my drooping head. Besides verbally shutting down when scared, my mind and body like to shut off completely too.
“Because two is sometimes better than one,” Sarah continued.
I laughed, finally. “I see some flaws in that logic.”
She slapped my hand. “You would. Come on. Talk to me.”
“It’s a shock, really. I wasn’t expecting… that.” I raised both hands in the air, finally showing some life.
Sarah straightened in her seat, seeming relieved the emotional zombie was sparking back to normal. “It was a possibility. It’s always been a possibility for us. The way we did it—using more than one of your eggs to increase our chances.”
I remembered hearing that, but I’d always shoved it out of my mind, thinking surely it wouldn’t happen to me. To us. I fiddled with the corner of a paper placemat printed with a map of Vietnam.
Sarah’s eyes misted, and she dabbed each one with a napkin. “I still can’t believe it. When we heard the first”—she blotted her eyes again—“and then the second…”
I nodded, hearing the thudding sound, like it was muffled or underwater, in my ears again.
“All this time, we didn’t know.” She shook her head in amazement.
It was amazing, considering. Terrifying but also mind-blowing. Were two better than one?
“For thirteen weeks,” Sarah said, smoothing a hand over her belly, “I’ve been talking to one.”
“Not two.” I swallowed.
“Not two.” A flush of excitement surged in Sarah’s cheeks, and her smile lit up the room, connecting to my soul. “Twins, Lizzie. We’re having twins.”
A waiter set down our bowls, gave us a subservient bow, and left us in peace. I always found it odd that Sarah preferred this modest place over the wildly popular Vietnamese restaurant on College Avenue, which was decorated to the nines and had an hour-long wait, even for lunch. Maybe she preferred the quiet here, without the line snaking out the door. Or quite possibly, she didn’t want me, the socially inept, to embarrass her in front of the who’s who in Fort Collins.
Neither of us picked up our flimsy wooden chopsticks. Our eyes were locked on each other, communicating a thousand ideas at once.
“We may need a bigger house.” Sarah finally broke the trance.
“Trust me, our mini-mansion is large enough for twins.”
“Mock the mini-mansion all you want. You love our house.” Sarah split her chopsticks apart and stirred the noodles and chicken.
I reached across the table and enveloped her hand. “I love you.”
She
smiled and dug in, ravished. I picked at my meal. After several quiet moments, Sarah set her chopsticks to the side and asked in all seriousness, “So you aren’t mad?”
“Why would I be mad?”
“About the extra baby.”
“Hey, at least it’s not quadruplets.” I closed my eyes and sucked in a breath. “I would never be mad about having more than one baby. It’s just a lot to process.” I tapped the side of my noggin.
“Careful. You might anger the bats in your belfry.” She swirled the chopsticks in a circle in front of my face.
I smiled, shaking my head. “Are you going to let me talk?”
Sarah mimed zipping her full lips, but her endearing smile didn’t make any promises.
A cleansing breath escaped my mouth. “My mind doesn’t make leaps like this very easily. All along, I’ve been focusing on having a baby—one baby.”
“Ha! I bet your therapist has told you that a thousand times, about your mind not making leaps, and you’re finally accepting it.”
I shook my head playfully. “Be nice.”
Sarah’s facial expression softened. “I’m sorry. I’m feeling a bit punchy.”
“You always go above and beyond.” I winked.
“We used your eggs. This isn’t all on me.”
“Two of me are in there.” I pointed to her belly with my chopsticks.
Sarah paled.
“Geez, don’t look so scared when I put it that way. You’ll give me a complex.” I shoveled in rice and spicy beef doused with a healthy spritz of sriracha sauce, which made my nose twitch.
“Two Lizzies. What have I done?” She smothered her eyes with a palm.
I flinched as if she’d thrown ice-cold water in my face.
“Such easy pickings,” she mocked, laughing as she scooped in a mouthful of rice.
“You think you’re so funny.”
“I really hope having a sense of humor isn’t genetic.”
I jabbed my chopsticks in the air. “Take that back!”
“Or what?” She parried my chopsticks with hers.
“Or…”
The shimmer in her eyes knocked the words out of my head, and the confident arch of her left brow showed she was aware of her power over me.
Sarah put down her chopsticks and folded her hands on top of each other on the table. “What’s really troubling you?”
“I don’t… I mean, I want to be, but what if I suck at being a good parent? Knowing we’ll be responsible for two humans—and let’s face it, I didn’t have a stellar childhood.” I rubbed the top of my head. “I don’t want to fuck up our children. I really don’t. To this day, I still don’t have a great relationship with my father or brother. What kind of example would I be for—?” I pointed to Sarah’s stomach.
Sarah reached across the table and patted my hand, quieting my emotions with her touch. “No one knows what they’ll be like as a parent. The only thing we can do is love our children and each other. That’s all.” She trailed a fingertip along the top of my hand. The ticklish sensation muted my discontent, replacing it with desire for her. “You aren’t the only one who’s scared. It’d be weird if we weren’t.”
Oddly, that struck the right chord inside my brain.
“The thing that helps me get through each day is knowing how much you love me. You need to give yourself more credit. You can be infuriating at times, with your stubbornness, keeping secrets—”
“Isn’t this supposed to be a pep talk?” I nudged her foot under the table.
Sarah laughed. “You’re right. It’s just hard not mentioning your flaws whenever I can.”
“One of your many flaws, that’s for sure.”
“Oh, really.” Her voice increased an octave. “Do tell. What are my other flaws?” She playfully crossed her arms over her chest, snaring my attention away from the negative.
“You don’t show off your cleavage enough.”
She snorted and covered her mouth with a palm.
“They’re beautiful and getting better each day. You should share them with the world.”
The lines around her eyes crinkled with pleasure. “The world?”
“Maybe not. With me, though. Always with me.”
Sarah leaned forward, exposing enough for a sweet glimpse. “Any other flaws of this nature that I should address?”
“Take me home and find out.” I waggled my brows.
Sarah rummaged around in her purse, extracted three tens from her wallet, and tossed the bills on the table. Apparently, I wasn’t the only one who was hot to trot. “Maybe we should have more heart-to-hearts if this is the outcome.”
“Don’t ruin the moment.”
“Does it ruin the moment if I say I want you inside me?” Her sensual pout was even more convincing than her words.
I whisked her hand to my mouth and kissed her fingertips. “That could never ruin a thing.”
We stood and made a mad dash for the car.
Over her shoulder, Sarah batted her eyelashes at me. “Can you hold on until we get home?”
***
“Why is it when you’re in a hurry, roads that are typically empty are suddenly packed?” I groaned as Sarah eased the car a few feet forward before the traffic light turned red. It was the third time we’d had to wait for the same red light. Although we left the restaurant ten minutes ago, we’d barely traveled a block. I peered out the windshield. “The snow is melting before it reaches the road, so that can’t be the reason.”
“Karma’s a bitch.”
“How is this karma?” I jerked my head toward the gridlock and then leaned over to nibble on her earlobe.
Sarah moaned. “Anything’s possible, knowing you.” She kinked her neck, giving me better access to her milky skin.
“Why do you always assume I’m the one being punished? You, my dear, are not innocent. Like the time you jumped the gun and believed William when he said I ruined Meg’s life—forced her into prostitution.”
Sarah slapped my leg. “Is that how you treat the mother of your children, bringing up things from the past?”
“Because you never do? Besides, you’re always preaching that I should be honest. I, for a fact”—I traced my index finger down the front of her shirt—“know you are not pure. Not completely. I distinctly remember you sitting on my face last night.” I licked her neck, my tongue landing right behind her ear.
It made her breath hitch. “Lizzie—” she started to speak, but snapped her mouth shut.
“Wise woman.”
Again she visibly curbed her words, cinching her beautiful lips tight.
“It’d probably be faster to drive to Estes. What’s going on?” I peered through the windshield again, trying to spot the source of the holdup.
“I’m not sure I want to know. Traffic like this usually means one thing: a terrible accident.”
I nodded in agreement. “Turn around.”
“What?”
“I don’t want to see it, and I know you don’t either. So let’s not. No reason to kill the mood.” I slid my hand down her thigh and cupped her pussy, relishing the warmth through her jeans. “Turn here.”
Sarah put the blinker on and eased the car into position to turn onto the side street. “Now what?”
“Fancy a night away? Or a weekend? Otherwise, I may never get into your pants.”
An opening formed in the traffic, and Sarah claimed the space, merging into the lane. One step closer to freedom. “Really? The whole weekend?”
I laughed. “We just found out we’re having twins. In a few months, our chances to drop everything will be nil for the next eighteen years.”
“Eighteen years,” Sarah echoed, a tremble in her voice.
“Come on, sweetheart. Let’s live on the edge.” I grabbed my cell from the coin holder under the radio. Rule two for my guide for the socially inept: if you manage to convince a beautiful, sexy woman to marry you, make sure you co
ntinue to up your game to keep her interest. Spontaneous weekends away certainly qualified.
“What about Hank?”
“I’m already texting Maddie, best friend extraordinaire, to look in on the fiendish feline, although there’s enough food in his automatic dispenser for the week.”
“He’s not a fiend.”
“You should have seen him last night when I made him come inside. Hank has no idea what lurks in our neighborhood at night.” I attempted to cackle like a witch, but it sounded more like an old woman choking to death on her dentures.
“Acting isn’t in your future.” She flipped a U-turn on the side street, getting into line to turn onto the main road, heading away from the traffic.
“Sadly, no. Luckily, I have a beautiful wife to support me.” I grinned at her.
“Not to mention a substantial trust fund. What about clothes?” Sarah rounded back to the matter at hand.
I swiveled my head. “Puh-lease! You can smell a shopping mall a mile away.”
“I’ll need maternity clothes soon. Things are starting to get tight.” She tugged on the waist of her jeans.
“Not what I had in mind for the weekend, but I’m sure we can squeeze it in.”
“Oh, really? What’d you have in mind?” She widened her eyes.
“Clothes-wise, not much—if you want me to stick to this honesty thing you’ve been cramming down my throat.” My cell chimed. “Maddie’s in. She’s actually going to stay at our place.”
“What about Doug?”
I read the text aloud, “Perfect timing. Doug is driving me crazy. Will stay at your place. I think she wants time alone.”
“Uh-oh.”
“I’ve said it before; Doug is a nice guy. The excitement doesn’t last long with the nice ones.”
“But I like Doug. After all the shit your brother put her through, she needs someone who’ll treat her right.” Sarah steered back onto the street we’d been stuck on for over ten minutes, but now heading south out of Fort Collins.
“I know. But you don’t have to sleep with him.”